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Lahore: LDA or Lies Development Authority (Pygmy, Fair & Square dialogue)

P the Pygmy: Had Aristotle been alive today and lived in Pakistan, he would have committed suicide.

Fair & Square: Why such an extreme option?

P: Because of the question-answer epidemic that has taken over Pakistan.

Fr & Sq: But intelligent people are never afraid of asking or answering questions.

P: No, Sir. Here we are totally mistaken. Not all questions are meant to be asked. Likewise, every question just can’t be answered.

Fr & Sq: You are, in a way, promoting the idea of a controlled, suppressed society.

P: Not at all. I am rather trying to suggest to ‘think before we speak’. Our free-for-all attitude in saying things has endangered our security systems.

Fr & Sq: How come that?

P: Try to judge for yourself. Even a novice stringer doesn’t hesitate to discuss things as sensitive as our strategic assets and their locations. Such people are doing what even an enemy agent can’t do. And moreover, we have entrapped ourselves in a trap. Those unable to answer questions are rated as ignorant as if we were trying to build a nation of wisecrackers.

Fr & Sq: Certainly, that amounts to overkill.

P: We ought to be discreet. Even otherwise, ‘silence is golden’, says Confucius.

Fr & Sq: But where there is suppression, there is violence.

P: Can you quote any pertinent example?

Fr & Sq: I’ve before me a petty and irrelevant example but it explains the whole spectrum of our social and governance patterns. It’s about the ban imposed by Punjab CM on the use of government parks for receptions. Even that ban is breeding violence.

P: What has violence to do with parks? Are you talking about some kind of Jurassic Park inhabited by humans of the savage age?

Fr & Sq: No, I am talking of an era that does smack of savagery but in the modern age. Just the other day, some people using the park without authorization, took out guns when they were reminded by PHA officials that they were violating the ban. And the violators also include people from a self-righteous political-cum-religious party with HQs at Lahore.

P: But this is just a small reflection of the ‘defiance of authority syndrome’.

Fr & Sq: But it is now very much rampant in the whole society. I was, in fact, trying to suggest that we heed the undercurrents and be cautious while planning and exercising suppression. That will be of no service in any way.

P: Okay, that much for your sermon. Can you now tell me about the stringent action being contemplated by the Punjab chief minister against LDA officials guilty of negligence and what not?

Fr & Sq: I’ve just received a piece of information from a mole in LDA which says that Town Planning Wing officials have proved to be the most courageous species on this planet.

P: In what manner?

Fr & Sq: They had the courage to tell lies in writing and that too to the Punjab chief secretary despite knowing fully well that all their ‘fortunes’ might turn into dust that way.

P: Then, I’m justified in saying ‘L for lies, L for LDA’.

Fr & Sq: Yes, you know they unscrupulously wrote to the CS that they didn’t demolish some unauthorised constructions as per his (CS’s) order of August 22 because some courts’ status quo orders were operative. In fact, no such court orders were there.

P: Then, that also amounts to contempt of court as much as it is contempt of the CS and the CM.

Fr & Sq: Who cares?

P: But we better start caring now lest it turn into another wave. We are already drowned under many waves and tides like the wave of terrorism and wave of expectations (of both public and global powers).

Fr & Sq: But I think one wave is going to subside following the in-camera joint session of the Parliament on security issues.

P: Some ‘passengers of Mian’s arc’ doubt the efficacy of such sessions unless and until the parliamentarians were taken into confidence instead of ‘being informed only’.

Fr & Sq: To me, the best choice would be terrorists instead of parliamentarians. Why not do away with dependence on intermediaries and adopt the direct method of taking the extremists into confidence.

P: I think you are enamoured with the terrorists’ glorified living.

Fr & Sq: I am inspired by their decision-making power and what is more inspiring is that this lot doesn’t believe in double standards. I wish our ruling lot would have learnt lessons in fair approach and resoluteness from these men of honour.

P: Aren’t you subconsciously fomenting ‘honour killing’?

Fr & Sq: Honour comes through being honourable and not through ‘honour killing’. Above all, honour comes from within. It just can’t be poured on us like wonder drops from some magical fountain.

P: You are again giving us a very vague term as ‘being honourable’ is much ambiguous as ‘taking into confidence’.

Fr & Sq: Great people don’t bother about such things. We are otherwise blessed by Lord with immense wisdom. And for wise people, to be honourable is as easy as the ‘taking into confidence’ business.

Source: The News

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